Well today was a better day. Mentally at least. It was up and down otherwise.

I felt kind of flat and just tired all day. Work was busy.

On the upside, I caught a ditto in pokemon go, I got to work with two of my favorite coworkers, I won a grocery store reward for a $50 giftcard (I picked Target), and I felt more like eating today.

The downsides are that I was cold all day and the check engine light came on in my car on my way home from work. And now I'm stressed out and it's causing intestinal cramps (attractive, I know) and my dog is ignoring me.

So I can't really say if today was better or worse. But I felt better anyway. Except my stomach. Maybe don't go into my bathroom for a while.

Obligatory first post title

Today was not a great day. I woke up and almost immediately I was super depressed and sad. There's a lot going on in my life right now. I haven't been sleeping well. I have a lot of bills and work obligations and family stuff going on. I barely get to see my friends. And my boyfriend is across the god damn country and I have no idea when I'm going to see him next. I know with depression some days are just bad. But this was the worst day I've had in a long time.

I had to force myself out of bed. Force myself to get dressed. I think I forgot to brush my teeth. I cried a few times. Complained to the boyfriend. Managed to do some laundry. And I got myself to work.

Once I got to work I was a little better. But I just alternated feeling numb and tired and sad the whole day. I didn't manage to eat anything substantial until about 4:30pm.

It's hard being mentally ill when you have to be the boss. I'm trying to run a Starbucks. There are like a dozen things I have to keep track of at all times. And it's so hard when you get foggy depression brain. I managed decently tonight. It was a struggle. But I did it. It's like Parker (the boyfriend) said, it will pass.

Anyway, I took one and a half sleeping pills because I don't have a day off for another four days and I really need to sleep. I think it's kicking in.